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DALL·E 2025 03 27 11.35.54 – A 14 Year Old Boy Sitting At A School Desk, Looking Disinterested And Frustrated. A Concerned Teacher Stands Nearby, Trying To Engage With Him In A Su

School Behavior


My son Raj is 14 years old, and there is a constant complaint from him that he does not like to go to school. He says that there is nothing worthwhile taught in school these days and that the teachers are not taking interest as before. He feels that the schools are just a money-making business for the trustees and that very little is done in the name of education.

I also went to his principal, but she was unaware of the guidelines that a teacher should have in the development of a child. Can you give guidance on this topic?

The Role of Schools in a Child’s Development

The school needs to be taken as an extension of the family. If parents were able to undertake the education of their children, there would be no need for schools. However, due to our present-day complex demands, schools are needed to lighten the workload of parents and build on what they have begun. Social integration demands a higher level of education than can be given in homes.

The aim for teachers is not only to train children to earn their living but also to work in ways beneficial to humankind. Teachers must be conscious of the importance of this task and be trained to fulfill it. The most important task is character training.

The Challenges Children Face at School

Many children come to schools having already failed in family life, and they continue making the same mistakes despite all the lectures and exhortations they receive. These children, when they go to school, face a new test in social life—a test that will reveal any shortcomings in their development.

They must now cooperate in a wider field than before. If they have been pampered at home, they may be unwilling to leave their sheltered life and join in with the other children. They may be disinterested in school and in the classroom. It is difficult for them to listen to what is being said because they are thinking of themselves all the time.

Due to this self-interested manner, they are unable to make progress in school. These children will have no problems at home, but the trouble arises only when they are at school. The answer is apparent: they are in a favorable situation at home where there are no tests, so the mistakes in their development are not apparent. At school, they are no longer indulged and consequently experience their situation as a defeat.

The Role of Teachers

  1. Identifying and Correcting Developmental Issues
    The second task for teachers is to notice the child’s difficulties and correct the parents’ mistakes. Some children may not be intellectually retarded but are unable to adjust to social life, and teachers are in the best position to help them meet what is, in fact, a new situation for them. Here, the role of a teacher is that of a family caretaker—a mother or father—who bonds with the children and gains their attention. This cannot be done through severity or punishment. If a child comes to school and finds it difficult to relate to his teachers and fellow pupils, the worst possible thing is to criticize and scold him. This would only confirm that he was right to dislike school. He would look for ways to get out of the situation and avoid school altogether. It is mainly the children for whom school is made an artificially unpleasant environment who play truant, perform poorly, and appear stupid or difficult to handle. They are not stupid; they display great ingenuity in making up excuses for not attending school.
  2. Getting Children Interested in Learning
    The third task is to get the child interested in learning. For that, teachers must discover what the child’s interests are and convince him to make a success of those interests. Once he feels confident about one subject, it is easier to stimulate his interest in others. Any subject should be taught in the context of the rest of his life so that the child can see the purpose of the instruction and the practical value of what he is learning. There should be a combination of teaching children to absorb facts and to think for themselves.
  3. Teaching Cooperation vs. Competition
    The next task for the teacher is to teach cooperation and handle competition in the classroom. Children are better prepared for competition rather than cooperation. Some surge ahead and strain to beat other children, while some fall behind and give up the struggle. Both behaviors are disasters because the children are primarily interested in themselves. Their primary objective is to obtain what they can for themselves. The teacher has to train the child so that he is interested in others and enjoys cooperation. This can help him change his attitude through interest and cooperation.
  4. Understanding the Child’s Emotional Struggles
    One common situation is when a child performs badly at school, is scolded for it there, takes the report home, and is punished again. One experience is discouraging enough; to experience double the punishment is cruelty. Such a child would become an under-achiever and disruptive. The task of the teacher is to understand his perception of the whole world as hostile and help him get over it.
  5. Assessing the Development Level of the Child
    Another important task of the teacher is to help assess the child’s development level. The greatest problem in education is posed not by the limitations of the child but by what he thinks his limitations are. If a child thinks he is intellectually behind, he loses hope and believes that success is beyond him. The teacher must direct her energies toward increasing the child’s confidence and interest in removing the limits he has set on his own powers. The child himself has quite a sound judgment about his abilities, but the mistake is believing that he cannot do better. He sees others ahead of him and believes that he cannot catch up. A fixation on this idea can follow him throughout his life. Even as an adult, he will calculate his position in relation to others and assume that he is lagging behind. The task of the teacher is to help him overcome this belief.

(To be continued next week)